2016 in Two Words: Plot Twist
If I could summarize 2016 in two words, itāll be ā Plot twist. I think I was done with it by May. The twists kept coming and I kept winging it like a pro. You can only wing it for so long, for ~365 days. At some point, you're bound to get a sprain (which I did). All this, clearly could have been duly avoided if I had done the most important thing at the beginning of the year:
Asked God for a personal, specific word for the year.
It would have made it much easier. Instead, I looked for words as the twists came. They worked, as always, but it was tasking.
For sure, this can't be the case in the coming year. 2017 must be renowned as the year we heard, we followed and we triumphed!
If you don't have a word yetāand I don't mean the general word announced at church on NYE, I mean your own exclusive, intimate instruction and reassurance from our heavenly Papa, please sit with Him this last few days of the year and get it. It's important because when the plot twists come, then you can smack āem in the face with that irrefutable promise from your Father *smirk* Also when you have a specific word from God, you are able to mutter it beneath your breath or scream it out when things look the exact opposite of the promise; great way to look crazy, which I personally prefer.
2016 wasn't all twisty. It was full of so many blessed opportunities, travel, love, you (yes, you PGI reader), fun posts, new friends, old friends. One amazing thing I did this year though was teach my mum how to blogā¦on FaceTime! Lol! It was the funnest and funniest thing ever. It made me appreciate her so much. I couldnāt be impatient because I know how patient she was with me as a baby learning to walk, learning to eat, learning to pronounce! So with patience, I'd say, "No, mum. That's not your password." I guess now, we all know where I got my password-recall situation from.
I'm grateful for the twists. The brought me to a place of serenity and clarity; so much that I don't pray to avoid the twists but I pray to be focused on Christ and to hold on to whatever he has told me about 2017. Do you have your word yet?
For more highlights, amazing plans for 2017 and more news please watch out for our freshly designed newsletters! 2017 is going to be so exciting! If you haven't subscribed, whaaaaa? Do it! Do it!
What's so Wrong with 'Woman on Top'?
I have written 4 separate drafts of this post, each at least 400 words long. In all of them, i sound a little crazed, and mildly temperamental. Lol. It's what happens when it occurs to me that in 2016, women are still fighting for rights. This post is void of all sentiments, which i've found is a great way to think clearly.
I have a question, what is so bothersome about a woman being in the same league as men?
This is a happy read, so put your guards down. For the people who thought this post was about sexual positions, sorry.
Women, we WILL get those rights, the right to make as much as men, to get the same educational and occupational opportunities, to own property, to speak freely. However, we all need to want these rights, not just some of us. Women are wonderful beings, but still in this age, solidarity still has to be preached to us!
We are sentimental individuals and we are heavy on those emotions, right? We make a lot of our decisions based on how we feel, in addition to our skills and that's great! It's an amazing selling point for us. We bring intuition and human concern into board rooms and warmth into the lives of those around us but we also bring other negative emotions too, sometimes. These emotions are usually targeted at other women. I've been a recipient of some of these "emotions" from women i was subordinate to. Why? Maybe because i was young, sometimes older women dislike younger women; maybe because i had long, skinny legs. These were the reasons my friends gave me for my superiors' behaviors. To be honest, i would have given them those legs, if i could. Lol. Seriously though, we need to be more supportive of one another.
Men mentor one another, men help each other, men recommend one another for positions....even if they dislike the other person. Surveys and studies show all these. For women though, that's not how we roll. We backbite, gossip, snicker, bully each other and think a system will take us seriously? The rights start with us. We need to respect one another, value each others' rights and honor other women.
Men, empowering women does not mean you'll lose status or that we'll take over the world. Haha, if we wanted to take over the world, Eve would have eaten that fruit, all of it and given Adam nothing. She'd have made a smoothie and planned a flawless, instant world take-over, while Adam ran around with butterflies.
No human should have to beg for a better quality of life. Women shouldn't have to struggle to be as successful as any man. Success shouldn't be an unachievable luxury.
Being 'the man of the house', means that you protect, nurture and beautify the woman and not oppress her. You should decorate and honor her, encourage her to follow her dreams. Find a good balance for raising your kids. Don't blackmail her or make her feel bad for wanting more. Don't bully her to stroke your ego. That's distasteful (And distasteful isn't trending). Please, defend women in public and speak up, don't just be quiet and watch your sisters, nieces, wives, mothers struggle for rights that are theirs.
For the Christians who use the bible as an excuse to subjugate women, my peeps, Jesus Christ came to empower women. The woman with the constant period, yes, the society-reject who everyone 'eww-ed' at, he restored and reintegrated her into the community. Mary M, the most sultry girl out there, who was a prostitute, was his friend. He helped her choose a better life. He hung out with Mary and Martha. On the cross, in his pain and sorrow, he made living arrangements for his mum! Luke 8: 1-3 names women who gave Jesus money for his ministry; working women who financially empowered Jesus! Then you say, women should not be empowered? Are you kidding me?!
Fix the problem, don't be the problem.
xx
PGI Feature: Men's Style by Deji Eniola
I met Deji within the first few hours of NYSC camp (you guys have no idea how much treasure i found on those camp grounds- no idea). We were on this ridiculous registration queue from noon until 9pm standing in the sun and then the moon! At about 8.55pm, it began to rain, most people ran for shelter and deserted the ridiculous queue. I looked to my right, saw a plastic chair and lifted it above my head as my make-shift umbrella; to my left was this guy who had grabbed a chair too. We were not kidding here, we were going to be registered no matter what- rain, volcano, avalanche. We stood there and instantly, i knew we'd be friends. He struck me as irrationally resilient and brilliantly resourceful; the perfect fuses for being an entrepreneur! Deji Eniola Osinulu, is the Creative Director of the Nigerian-based Men's bespoke fashion label- Deji Eniola. His brand is frequently sighted on the red carpet, and featured in the 2015 Lagos Fashion and Design Week last October. He has styled some of our favorite celebrities such as TuFace Idibia, M.I Abaga, Christopher Attoh, Dj Spinall, Gideon Okeke.
Here he is; the man behind DE:
Deji, what do you love the most about what you do?
The ability to birth forms and the grace to make something out of nothing
How did you know it had to be fashion?
It was the only thing that didnāt seem it would leave me if every other thing that could leave left. It felt like my āRuthā. It was that thing that puts me in my zone. It was my element. Imagine Kanye telling you āDonāt let me get into my zoneā ā¦because there will be no respite for any lyricist challenger against him. *LoL*
How did you learn to design and sew?
Designing is innate for me. It is the only thing I didnāt learn, I definitely had to hone the skill though. However, you know when they say a writer needs to write all the bad stuff out of her system first before getting to the good part? Yeah, I had to design all the ārubbishā out of me first. *Laughs* Then it got to the good part.
With sewing, I took tailoring classes twice actually, once, during my last year in college and also during my NYSC service year on weekends. I started with female outfits. Surprise!
What's your most creative period of the day?
Mornings mostly, probably because i'm still calm enough to be in tune with my mind and spirit. I get ideas and themes at other times of the day too but I find that mornings are most frequent
What's the most unusual inspiration you've ever had?
Colour block! Before the craze started, those words literally floated into my mind. I didnāt understand it to the extent of implementing it. Months later, ācolour blockingā swarmed the catwalks and filled the magazine pages.
Whatās your creative space like?
I guess by that, you'd be referring to my flat. My studio is quite comfy, and well laid out. I have tried to avoid clutter to give the illusion of more space than it actually has. My bedroom seems to have me more when it comes to designing.
If you could, what would you change about the world of fashion?
Christopher Attoh in D.E
Vanity- but on second thought, I'd rather leave it alone, because it forms the basic foundation of the existence and advancement of fashion, although, the indistinct borderline between ānecessaryā vanity and āabsurdā vanity seems to have faded, the inability to define this borderline, is the ample reason why it should just be left alone. There is a saying āKill all my demons and my Angels might die tooā
The most stressful thing about getting a bespoke service is the wait time! How long does it take you to complete a suit?
It takes an average of 21 working days for our half canvassed suits and much longer for the fully canvassed ones. Waiting is an inherent feature of bespoke. You honestly can't rush the process.
Who are your most admired local (and foreign) designers?
I like the Okunoren twins, I like their story and that they have journied on roads that we now tread. I like Paul Smith for starting his business with just 600GBP and also Ozwald Boateng, for being the first designer (to the best of my knowledge) to lend an African identity to a British heritage.
Your most important work equipment?
My eyes! *Laughs*
After all has been done, from design concept to design execution, what determines if it will make the shelves or hit the runway is its appeal! Beauty doesnāt need a second opinion to know if itās pleasing or not. I stand back and look at it and immediately I know if it will make it or not.
The most challenging part of designing?
Designing for another! To design for someone else, you have to become him, you have to think like him, you have to know what he likes to do, his preferences and tastes. All that factors into the creative process.
What do you love the most about Lagos?
The beauty in its chaos!
What app do you use the most on your phone?
What's your favorite game?
M.I Abaga in D.E
Grand Theft Auto, Baby!
Your first thought in the morning?
God. And then more God!
The most alarming incident you've seen on Ikorodu road?
I saw a Toyota Highlander burning right there on the express with no one trying to quench the fire. It just got charred and everyone continued their day!
Lagos Traffic survival kit?
If I'm driving; a chilled bottle of coke, (partly iced), music, air conditioning and interesting company. If I'm not driving-a book.
Can you cook?
Yes, I can. I find pleasure in cooking.
Alright then, what's your most exquisite Deji Eniola-made dish?
Haha, see trap! Well, remove the word āexquisite". That word might be a little tricky! *Laughs* It'll have to be noodles!
Deji Eniola with a model
Four things i learnt!
1. "Beauty doesn't need a second opinion..."
2. Understand your industry and what makes it tick!
3. "Write out all the rubbish" and then GOLD!
4. Deji came up with Colour block! What?! If he told me then, we would be gazzilionaires right now! Thanks alot, man.
Thank you, Deji for being PGI's February feature! Below are photos from the Deji Eniola Spring collection as seen at the Lagos Fashion and Design Week! Enjoy!
If you are planning your wedding and bae and the groomsmen intend to buy their suits the day before the wedding like most men do, Lol; tell them to check DE out! They can't go wrong!
Contact
Email: de.bespoke@yahoo.com
Phone: +2348169282829
Follow on IG @dejieniola
Feb-o-mania! Catch the Bug
Welcome to February! Remember 31 days ago, when we were estatic about January, well, clearly we are over that now! Sayonara, January! February is here, the month of heightened flirtations, torrid redezvous, weirdly shaped candies and all that good stuff!
However, before we get carried away with February's red-panic and the crazy frenzy, we need to start off the right way......I'm going to ask you a question which you are required to answer, a question you probably weren't expecting me to ask; a question you would be glad I'm not there to ask you in person because it would be weird, the air would get heavy and we'd both be very uncomfortable. Ok, are you ready? Here goes..........
'Do you love me?'
I'd appreciate if you answer honestly and out loud.
Just in case you didn't know, you ARE supposed to love me, just like you love yourself, but then you already knew that. It's the greatest power that ever will be, not to mention the most difficult and the most unnatural human trait. Love is a higher become-a-better-me kinda calling but it's worth it in the end because it always protects you!
It makes us immune to evil, it protects our minds from getting easily hurt and jaded. It keeps us sane and helps us get through the most tumultuous of situations.
However, most of us know love in theory but fail in its practicals. We fail to actively, creatively and intentionally love the people in our lives the way we should.
So, since I'm the largest culprit of all (guilty face and rosy cheeks), here's what I'm doing for the whole month, I'm taking my phone contacts, starting from the first person with the name beginning with "A" and I'm finding ways to love everyone uniquely. I'm calling it the Feb-o-mania! Love is not a one-size-fits-all, it's deliberate and tailored. Let's love, just as such.
Have a great February ahead.....and don't think I didn't hear you mumbling "Yes" to that question. **Blush** I love you too!
Feb-o-mania plans? Share! How would you show you love to friends and family? What do they appreciate the most? How does this fit into your love techniques for them?
The Friendship Challenge!
Friends love through all kinds of weather āļø āļøšØāšŖ ā”ļøšØāļø
To all my friends, old and new, 2016 is that year you have NOT been waiting for! I'm on a become-a-better-friend campaign and so I guess I'll be in your faces very much this year.
*Intermission*
Every time I post something like this, I get tried and tested immediately! I feel like there are some mystical blog deities that just send me bouts of trials, mandating that i practice what i preach the moment I publish stuff that is targeted at improving lifestyles. Anyway, i'll have another accountability post soon!
*End intermission*
Where was I? I'm trying to be a better friend and family member. 2016 is that year when I will be in your face, call you at odd hours, make awkward video calls, put up photos of us riding on camels in Dubai, throw back on Thursdays with you (beware of old unflattering photos on instagram).
P.s I have never been to Dubai, friends, 2016 is the year of Dubai! Let's buy tickets and fulfill this camel-riding photo dream!
So a quick glance on how to improve my friend status this year....
According to the Stanford Encyclopedia, friendship is built on 3 main platforms:
1. Concern: Reciprocated concern actually, not just regular concern; and according to Aristotle, spending time with your friends, wanting the best for and doing good to them is pretty pivotal to healthy friendships. Err...so no envying or being too busy or ignoring calls *blink*
2. Intimacy: Sharing experiences and information that build trust which also implies that we must avoid anything that would weaken the trust so painstakingly built e.g gossip
3. Shared activity: I need to find creative, fun activities to do with you guys! This is where Dubai comes in! *Grin*
I'm so excited about this and I know what you're thinking, my friends.....I forgive you in advance for ignoring my calls.
Becoming a better friend this year? Yup or Nah-ah?
Friendship-themed Give-Away coming up soon!
#NoFools2016
āBecome wise by walking with the wise; hang out with fools and watch your life fall to piecesā
#Nofools2016 #NothingPersonal
6 Environmentally-Friendly Tips for your Wedding
It's 2016 and we all owe it to our planet to be environmentally conscious and 'green', right? Loving the earth every day and taking care of it is our responsibility, even on our big days! Many people give it very little consideration because we are a little preoccupied with the perfect cake, perfect flowers, the 9-foot chocolate fountain and the ice sculpture of you and bae standing under the Eiffel Tower or some other landmark of considerable importance. No one cares about the earth on their wedding day! I definitely didn't care. I didn't think my own event contributed to any environmental degradation, but it probably did, for one, the cooks in the backyard cooking with firewood so we could get the authentic jollof rice taste and aroma may have made a little contribution. That rice though....š
Now seeking ways to right my wrong but Earth, you and I know jollof rice ain't jollof rice without firewood. So we have to find a middle ground. A "smoky-flavored jollof rice" seasoning might be the solution; Nestle, Unilever, I just dropped a product development pitch in your lap. BAM!
Ok, things went jollof-centric suddenly. Back to the reason for the post; here are a few things to consider when planning a "green" wedding.
Electronic invites
Paper wedding invitations are pretty (most of them, anyway) and are tangible, which are their main selling point. Although, thought should be given to electronic invites. They are instant; no wait times and are paperless. You and I know where paper invites end up; fending off soldier ants in the rainy season- ablaze; as make-do dustpans and in less dramatic parts of the world, I guess they just end up in the shredder. I know how long it took for me to make a decision about my paper invitation cards, to think that's how they ended up, lol, yup, I should have done the e-invites. Two e-invite platforms that make very pretty, chic invites are paperless post and labellecarte.
Wedding dress(es)
Do you really need two dresses? If you do, Make sure your second dress is beautiful and practical enough to join your wardrobe subsequently. Reuse makes the earth happily green.
Bridesmaids dresses
To all the bridesmaids out there, I got you. Let your bridesmaids choose their dresses, there's a higher chance they'd pick a dress that could be reused for other occasions with little or no modifications. Pretty Dresses= Happy bridesmaids= Reuse= Green wedding
Favors
Are your favors useful? Yes? Are they useful short-term or long-term and unique? Honestly, if I could trade in all the plastic fans favors that accumulated in my house in 2005 and the wall clocks in 2008 for a kobo, iād be writing in my beach house somewhere on the Pacific. Favors are given with the right intent; to honor the bride and groom while giving out a gift to the guests. Give out favors and souvenirs that are useful and unique.
Gifts (registry)
Get people to spend wisely by setting up a registry with things you actually want and also to avoid duplicity. Many-a-wall-clock strewn around the homes of newly-weds, when they actually would like a pressure cooker.
Flowers
Use fresh flowers from the bouquet as potpourri. Even though the bouquet falls apart after the toss most of the time. If you have them all around reception area, potpourri is a good idea! Here's a link on how to make potpourri!
Here are more tips for the hard-core nuptial environmentalists.
Have a wonderfully green wedding and if you are throwing rice as confetti, remember to sweep it and eat it for dinner!
Lol!!! I'm kidding! I'm kidding! I just had to.
xx
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year, Everyone!
I have zero New Year resolutions! Yay! I do have goals though. Dangerously ambitious goals relating to all aspects of my life; for one, God and I need to go back to our 5&6 status; I need to build on my professional skills; need to build on my kitchen portfolio-the amount of rice I ate in 2015, could probably fill a 3000 square feet house; need to learn to use chopsticks-no more asking for forks at Chinese restaurants; I need to say "Splendid" when I'm pleased and not "Yay"- overused that expression; need to stop saying "Ah!" when I'm surprised, as the Yoruba girl that I am. I might resume again in 2017, though.
Most importantly, I have huge goals to get to know my readers more and to express my appreciation more often. So, thank you for the support, love, comments, messages, wishes on PGI in 2015. I pray God makes this year fun and full of life for us and that we continue to learn as a community.
What are your 2016 goals?